Confederate Eyelets

So its almost the weekend, which gets me thinking about weekends. Who got to designate which days would be 'week days' and which would be 'weekends'. I would probably guess that it's some kind of jewish thing because they had Sabbath on Sat night/Sunday. Back in the day I'm sure that people worked like everyday of the week if they weren't jewish. We got it good now though, compared to then. I wonder how much more stuff would be around if nobody acknowledged weekends. There might be lik 2/7 more stuff, ya know? Stuff is interesting too. When somebody says something about creating things, I just see it as manipulating pre-existent material to make it look different or something. I know, I know...people can create things by using words and stuff like poetry, but I'm more interested in physical stuff. Like plastic. Plastic is petroleum based and petroleum comes from dead stuff like dinosaurs. So when I'm suckind down a rootbeer through a plastic straw, I'm really sucking it through a dead dinosaur. There must have been lots of dinosaurs in Iraq because of all the oil they have there. It's like we're grave-robbing or something and I'm sure there's some kinda bad karma coming from all that. I wish I knew more about that kinda stuff. Speaking of grave-robbing, when does archaeology become grave-robbing? I think it would be cool to dig up some dead civil war guy and see what he has. I bet the only things that are left are bones, belt buckles, buttons and eyelets. Wouldn't that be strange? There would be like a handfull of eyelets from his shoes down around his ankles. I bet the market is good for Confederate eyelets right now. Pretty hot commodity. If I was going to be a grave robber I would get business cards that said "tomb raider" instead. I'm sure there's lots of ethical issues that have to be sorted out before I begin my tomb raiding business. My mom said that the first job I ever wanted was 'climbing trees'. That seems like such a good idea for such a small kid. Even now, I wouldn't mind climbing trees for a living. Not doing anything to them either. Just climb them, climb down and then pick up the paycheck on friday. Kids don't think too far into that kind of stuff, its just 'going to work'. I used to hate when people would ask what I wanted to be in elementary school. I remember that I used to screw with teachers and tell them that I wanted to be an astronaut because I was pretty certain that they would have like nothing to say about that. I was always screwing with teachers like that. Saying stuff that I knew wasn't true but would make them think I was nuts or something. They knew I wasn't nuts, but I got a kick out of it. Crazy people are, well, crazy. I think I'm going to be a terrible father. My kid is going to puke or something and I'm gonna be like "See what you did you frickin' nOOb!". :) Just kidding. I'm probably gonna tell them all kinds of fake stories that wouldn't make any sense to anyone but a kid, ya know?