Lookin' Out For Future You

What time is it, Stormy?  I said, it's Christmas time, bitch!  I started a retirement fund yesterday.  It's totally gonna kick ass...in like a hundred years.  What really made me do it was that I saw the total accummulation in my 'fund' was zero and I thought to myself, "Hey, you can get by on zero!  You did it for like 5 years in college, right?" and then I thought, "Wait, that broke-college thing kinda sucked..." so now I will have a retirement fund so I can have retirement fun.  At least that's the goal.  So, now that I'm looking out for future Ryan, I can devote more energy to looking out for future other people. 

Joe:  Don't forget to put your gas cap back on after you fill up your tank.  That shit will make your 'check engine' light go on after a while.

Natanis:  Make sure you get enough vitamin C so that you don't get all scurvy on us.  I hear you bleed through your nose and puke up crazy shit if that happens.  Put a lime in your Corona or something.

Ness:  Try to wear a scarf if it's really cold and you anticipate being outside for a long period of time.  Maybe that one that your aunt made last year.  It will help prevent a sore throat.

Phoenix:  The second Sunday in March is daylight savings time.  Don't forget to set your clock ahead!  Wouldn't want you to show up at work an hour early.

Timbo:  Pick up some stamps the next time you are at the post office.  It totally sucks running out and having to make an extra trip so save yourself the hassle and get them ahead of time.

BSalerno:  Get a carbon monoxide detector for your new place.  I hear that stuff is totally odorless and colorless and will kill you and your family.  I know, that sounds like a total bummer, but I just wanted to warn you.

Moonz:  Check yourself for ticks the next time you are out in a field or in the woods.  Lyme disease sucks.  I've had ticks before, but thankfully they weren't Lyme infected ones.  You can usually feel a sore spot where they are embedded in you.  Check yourself before you wreck yourself.

Fleur: Make sure you take your jacket next time you leave a restaurant/diner/coffeeshop.  Well, maybe not next-next time because it will probably be wicked cold out and you will notice right away...but in the springtime when it gets warmer, it is much easier to forget.

 Meg: Check the tire pressure in your car.  Having properly inflated tires will reduce the amount of wear on them and help with gas mileage, saving you a few bucks.

Ringer: Always try to read the fine print before signing important documents.  Sometimes you can get screwed in the future and not even be notified about the screwing because you signed something that says that they can screw you for some stupid infraction. 

For All of the New Australian Kids Here:  Winter will be there before you know it.  Make sure your doors and windows are well-sealed with weather stripping to cut down on energy costs during the cold months.