Why, Laserjet? Why?

I bet that if you were alive 50 years ago and somebody told you that in the future there would be laserjets, you would probably imagine something way cooler than what laserjets turned out to actually be. I think that's a damn shame. I don't want to live in a world where laserjets are cumbersome, drab grey computer peripherals. You had so much potential, 'laserjet' the word. You could've been soaring through outerspace at nearly the speed of light, shooting death rays into stars and blowing up planets. But no. You just sit there next to my crappy desk, sucking up recycled paper and grinding out documents. Documents! Accountants work with documents. I don't know how you go sleep mode at night. You make me sick.