The Official Blog of Major League Librarians

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Idiot Move of the Day!

Man, I'm a real idiot sometimes.  I just stapled my sleeve to a stack of papers and I had to have a secretary help get it out because I couldn't undo the staple with my left hand.  It also didn't help that I had just cut my fingernails and they were too short to get ahold of the tiny staple parts.  I almost used a binder clip for it too!  Always go with your gut instinct. 

Astronomy Picture of the Day!

At about 100 meters from the cargo bay of the space shuttle Challenger, Bruce McCandless II was further out than anyone had ever been before. Guided by a Manned Maneuvering Unit (MMU), astronaut McCandless, pictured above, was floating free in space. McCandless and fellow NASA astronaut Robert Stewart were the first to experience such an "untethered space walk" during Space Shuttle mission 41-B in 1984. The MMU works by shooting jets of nitrogen and has since been used to help deploy and retrieve satellites. With a mass over 140 kilograms, an MMU is heavy on Earth, but, like everything, is weightless when drifting in orbit. The MMU was replaced with the SAFER backpack propulsion unit.

Adventures In Piano Moving

Hey, I just thought that I would throw this out there before leaving work today.  This weekend I helped my buddy move a piano from a bar (The Bunker) to his house.  It was not really too much fun, but we did our best to have as good a time as possible under the conditions.  A word of advice: Don't move pianos in the rain.  Kind of a bad idea.  Here's another bit of advice:  Don't move pianos.  Just burn them.  Seriously.

Here's Paul jamming on his new piano...in the back of a pick-up truck...at the bar.  It was an insane impromtu concert.  He rocks on piano. 

Good day!

Sexual Harassment

So on next Wednesday I'll be taking the mandatory 'Sexual Harassment Training' here at work.  I can't wait.  I'm already pretty good at sexually harassing people but after this two hour refresher course, I'll be a certified pervert.  Maybe I'll learn the proper form for winking at secretaries or how to pinch asses without leaving tell-tale bruises.  Sexual harassment is fun.

Astronomy Picture of the Day!

The clouds in the foreground are much different than the clouds in the background. In the foreground are a photogenic deck of Earth-based water clouds. The long exposure used to create the above photograph makes the light from the left, reflected from Phoenix, Arizona, USA, appear like a sunset. Far in the distance, however, are star clouds from the disk of our Milky Way Galaxy. Billions of stars like our Sun live there, circling our Galactic center every 200 million years. Contrast between the water clouds and the star clouds has been digitally enhanced. Between the two, visible on the upper right, is the planet Jupiter.

Funny Interoffice E-mail

This just came into my e-mail inbox and I thought it was funny enough to share. 

Kurt (last name) just found out today that he passed the CT bar. Wish we had known that before we traded him to UTC for a paralegal to be named later. In any event, in honor of Kurt's miracle, we are shutting down the office for the rest of the month. Woo hoo!

Astronomy Picture of the Day!

Shiny NGC 253, sometimes called the Silver Dollar Galaxy, is one of the brightest spiral galaxies visible - and also one of the dustiest. First swept up in 1783 by mathematician and astronomer Caroline Herschel, the dusty island universe lies a mere 10 million light-years away in the southern constellation Sculptor. About 70 thousand light-years across, NGC 253 is the largest member of the Sculptor Group of Galaxies, the nearest to our own Local Group of Galaxies. In addition to its spiral dust lanes, striking tendrils of dust seem to be rising from the galactic disk in this gorgeous view. The high dust content accompanies frantic star formation, giving NGC 253 the designation of a starburst galaxy. NGC 253 is also known to be a strong source of high-energy x-rays and gamma rays, likely due to massive black holes near the galaxy's center.

Astronomy Picture of the Day!

Stars themselves can create huge and intricate dust sculptures from the dense and dark molecular clouds from which they are born. The tools the stars use to carve their detailed works are high energy light and fast stellar winds. The heat they generate evaporates the dark molecular dust as well as causing ambient hydrogen gas to disperse and glow red. Pictured above, a new open cluster of stars designated IC 1590 is nearing completion around the intricate interstellar mountain named NGC 281. The dust cloud NGC 281, dubbed the Pacman nebula because of its overall shape, is classified as a dense Bok Globule that lies about 10,000 light years distant.

Wednesday Reflection

Well, I'm bored at work and I figured what better way to spend a few minutes than to impart random knowledge on you, dear reader. By the way, I'm sorry I called you an idiot before. So here is what I learned on the bus yesterday. It has to do with an amazing feat of anti-engineering. Have you ever wondered why QWERTY keyboards are set up so crazy? Me neither, but the answer is kind of interesting. Turns out...back in the day when typewriters were first invented, they had those metal arms with the letters on them that would swing up and punch the paper to print that given letter onto it. The very first keyboards were laid out alphabetically but the problem was that a lot of the letters that were used frequently happened to be situated directly next to each other. When people got proficient at typing, they would strike the keys so fast that the metal arms would get jammed together. So, someone got the idea of spreading out the most frequently used keys to make it harder for people to type fast. They also decided to put the most frequently used ones on the left side of the board to make it even more difficult for the majority of typists who were right handed. So, there you have it. The guy that anti-engineered the keyboard was actually trying to make it as difficult as possible to type on it so that the typewriter wouldn't jam. I also read that if the keyboard were laid out efficiently, we would be able to type 75% faster. Reflect on that.

Astronomy Picture of the Day!

How can gas float above the Sun? Twisted magnetic fields arching from the solar surface can trap ionized gas, suspending it in huge looping structures. These majestic plasma arches are seen as prominences above the solar limb. In September 1999, this dramatic and detailed image was recorded by the EIT experiment on board the space-based SOHO observatory in the light emitted by ionized Helium. It shows hot plasma escaping into space as a fiery prominence breaks free from magnetic confinement a hundred thousand kilometers above the Sun. These awesome events bear watching as they can affect communications and power systems over 100 million kilometers away on Planet Earth.

Outer Space

Looking at my last three blog posts, it would appear to the casual observer that I have somewhat limited the scope of my blog strictly to astronomy. Although I can easily see the logic behind this conclusion, I think you are an idiot. I don't even like astronomy. Frankly, I think the stars are pretty lame and all that empty space is kind of a waste. What have stars done for me lately? Twinkle twinkle? Seriously, get with the program. You've pretty much played out that whole nuclear fission chain reaction for years now and I think we're all pretty bored by it. It was a pretty amusing routine, I must admit, but I think you jumped the shark long ago. Oh yeah, by the way...Earth to moon: Tidal shifts are a fucking parlor trick. Come up with some original material. I feel more gravitational pull towards Kathy Griffin than you. God, outer space sucks.

Astronomy Picture of the Day!

Appropriately nicknamed "the Skull Nebula", planetary nebula NGC 246 really does surround a dying star some 1,600 light-years away in the constellation Cetus. Expelled over a period of thousands of years, the lovely, intricate nebula is the outer atmosphere of a once sun-like star. The expanding outer atmosphere is interacting with the gas and dust in the interstellar medium, while the star itself, the fainter member of the binary star system seen at the nebula's center, is entering its final phase of evolution, becoming a dense, hot white dwarf. Star and nebula are moving rapidly toward the top of the detailed view, as suggested by the nebula's brighter, upper, leading edge. The sharp image spans just over 2.5 light-years at the estimated distance of NGC 246 and also reveals distant background galaxies, some visible right through the nebula along the bottom.

Astronomy Picture of the Day!

The two bright sources at the center of this composite x-ray (blue)/ radio (pink) image are co-orbiting supermassive black holes powering the giant radio source 3C 75. Surrounded by multimillion degree x-ray emitting gas, and blasting out jets of relativistic particles the supermassive black holes are separated by 25,000 light-years. At the cores of two merging galaxies in the Abell 400 galaxy cluster they are some 300 million light-years away. Astronomers conclude that these two supermassive black holes are bound together by gravity in a binary system in part because the jets' consistent swept back appearance is most likely due to their common motion as they speed through the hot cluster gas at 1200 kilometers per second. Such spectacular cosmic mergers are thought to be common in crowded galaxy cluster environments in the distant universe. In their final stages the mergers are expected to be intense sources of gravitational waves.

Astronomy Picture of the Day!

No sudden, sharp boundary marks the passage of day into night in this gorgeous view of ocean and clouds over our fair planet Earth. Instead, the shadow line or terminator is diffuse and shows the gradual transition to darkness we experience as twilight. With the Sun illuminating the scene from the right, the cloud tops reflect gently reddened sunlight filtered through the dusty troposphere, the lowest layer of the planet's nurturing atmosphere. A clear high altitude layer, visible along the dayside's upper edge, scatters blue sunlight and fades into the blackness of space. This picture actually is a single digital photograph taken in June of 2001 from the International Space Station orbiting at an altitude of 211 nautical miles.

What's In Your Wallet?

So I was just reading some news article, because there is absolutely no way for me to more productively spend my last few hours at work today, and I read that the guy that is CEO of Capitol One made $250 million dollars last year.  Granted most of it was in stock options, so he must be doing his job well at least.  Anyways, I did the rather simple math on that.  It's a little less than $5 million a week.  That's about a one million dollars a day, which breaks down to $125,000 an hour.  That is pretty amazing.  I never want to hear another complaint about how much baseball players make. 

Wednesday Reflection

The sense of smell is pretty neat. I think its pretty amazing that tiny airborne particles of unknown origin can be detected and classified by something right on my face. I wonder if you can actually see the particles under a microscope or something. There is no doubt that they exist, but how small are they? Scents are really three dimensional entities that have physical properties. I wonder what the scent of a rose looks like, for instance. Maybe the sense of smell is really just a hypersensitive sense of touch. Like it can 'feel' the particles and translate them into what we have learned to call a 'smell'. How come water doesn't smell like anything? I obviously permeates the air, as evident in condensation on the side of a cold beer. Its strange how there is no smell associated with it. Reflect on that.

Astronomy Picture of the Day!

In this striking image, a rocket climbs skyward toward an expansive green auroral display in the first launch of 2003 from the University of Alaska's Poker Flat Research Range. Recorded on January 27th, the view from Cleary Summit near Fairbanks, Alaska shows the fiery tracks of both solid fuel stages of the Black Brant IX sounding rocket that lofted its payload to an altitude of 385 kilometers. Compared to rockets which launch payloads to Earth orbit and beyond, sounding rockets are small and relatively inexpensive. They get their generic name from the nautical term "to sound" which means to take measurements. Known as HIBAR (HIgh Bandwidth Auroral Rocket), this experiment was designed to measure aurora related high-frequency plasma waves which may originate thousands of kilometers above the aurora's visible glow.

Failure to Launch

Yep, its about that time. By 'that time' I mean 8:30. I think that the thirty minutes between 7:30 and 8:00 are the doldrums of the TV schedule. After Jeopardy! there is nothing more to look forward to unless something appealing happens to come onto PBS. So, today was pretty awesome. After work I went out with my buddy Joe to go hit some baseballs around. That lasted for about an hour and as we were starting to pack up we saw a guy with a kid coming over to the field to shoot off rockets. Immediately my fun-sensors picked up on this and I got the irresistable urge to befriend this guy until he lost his rocket in the woods or something equally catastrophic happened. So, we walked over to him and the little boy he was with. Turns out I went to high school with him and we played street hockey afterschool a few times. Couldn't believe it. So, we went with him to go set up his rocket and Joe and I pretty much assumed the roles of a pair of German rocket scientists. "Oh yah, zis vill vurk!". After it was all set up and ready to launch we broke into a stellar rendition of Major Tom and waited for lift-off. Nutzing. Fock! It was apparent to our trained German rocket scientist eyes that Ozzie (yeah, Ozzie) had no idea what he was doing. "Oh yah, vee can viddle vit it!" "Zees vires ah toching ze base!" "Svine-hund!" Yeah, Ozzie had the wires touching the metal base and it was interrupting the circuit. Its a damn good thing he had a pair of rocket scientists on hand. So, we had it all set up, Major Tom got cleareance from ground control and the little kid did the countdown...sssssswwwwiiiiiissssssss! Lift-off! Into the stratosphere baby! We did a full lunar orbit and got stuck in some trees upon re-entry. To the unexperienced eye it appeared as though the wind blew it into the woods, but to our trained German rocket scientist eyes, we could clearly see that some foam tiles had fallen off during lift-off and damaged the heat plates on the wings and the whole damn thing burned up on re-entry. We're hoping to re-launch sometime in 2012.

Nothing but Dumb

I got a new mousepad today.  Its about damn time too because I hate old mousepads.  I wash my hands like a maniac all day because the all around grodiness of the various things I am required to touch all day.  I don't even understand how they get dirty because I'm always washing my damn hands.  Anyways, only 4 more episodes of 7th Heaven left!  Will Rose marry Simon?  ...or will Umberto get in the way?  God, the suspense is killing me! 

Despicable

So I was thinking about 'getting sick' at or around noon today so I could go home and catch the Yankees home opener.  Not seriously thinking about it...just contemplating a little.  Then I realized why this is a terrible idea. 

Did you guys hear about the helicopter that got shot down in Iraq last week and someone posted a video on the internet showing Iraqis dragging the dead Americans around?  If you missed this, here is a link to the story on CNN.com

http://www.cnn.com/2006/WORLD/meast/04/05/iraq.main/index.html

Anyways, one of the guys on board used to date the other librarian here.  She's leaving early today to go to his wake. 

cavutto
Male - 28 years old
NEWINGTON, CT
United States
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